Chaos aka out of control headspace
Did you ever have a season in life where it was always hard and you were always waiting for the next bad news to land in your lap? Sometimes when we go through those seasons we often try to remind ourselves that it is only a season, but what happens when that season is way way longer than we expected it or ever anticipated it to be? What do we do? Do we move forward? Do we give up? How often do we sit around focussing on all the negative that surrounds our lives than we do focussing on all the actual blessings and positives we have in life? Surely, not every single thing is absolutely downright negative about our lives...right?! But why is it soooo easy to focus our minds and hearts on everything negative rather than positives?
Truthfully, I’m convicted as I write this. Raising teenagers is not for the weak hearted, so as I sit here in my bedroom focussing on all the negative that surrounds me I have asked God to truly help me deal with this season from a new perspective. This originally started out as racing thoughts through my mind that I feel needs to be jotted down. Now here I sit writing this blog. Here is what I believe God is telling me:
- Slow down! Don’t allow anxieties or thoughts to completely ruin the blessings God has given me and is trying to show me right in this very moment. Take some deep breaths and even cry if I feel like it. Take a few minutes to be alone and reflect on the positives: my husband, my kids, their health, my health, my pets, my home, health insurance, etc.
- Take a serious mental note as to what is really going on when it comes down to it. This season of bad news, negativity, loneliness, and heartbreak all comes down to satan at work. I need to remember that satan hates me, hates my husband, and hates my kids. He will literally stop at NOTHING to cause a disruption so I become distracted. In my distraction comes utter chaos aka my mind to go crazy causing a possible unwise action in response to my negative thoughts. So remember to see this for what it truly is.
- Take every thought captive. Pray! Seriously, just talk out loud to God. Tell him how mad I feel or how betrayal is liable to turn into bitterness. Be completely transparent (He already knows, but He wants you to trust Him enough to communicate even your deepest thoughts to Him). I can’t hear from God if I am not talking to Him myself. And when I don’t hear from God, that’s when I need to evaluate where I am at in my walk.
- Do something physical. Take a shower, clean a room, give the dog a bath, or go for a walk with my earbuds on full blast of my favorite music.
- Choose to forgive, but also be willing to ask for forgiveness when you actually have blown it because you allowed your thoughts to get out of hand.
I am very much still in this hard season of life. It seems to have been going on for quite sometime, but I am going to choose to get up off my bed and remember all that God has done and is doing these last 2 years in mine and my families hearts and lives. He truly has brought us all so far. I will choose to have faith that He will see us out of this when He sees fit. In the meantime, I am going to choose to walk confidently in who God is asking me to be and trust the He does have our back. And surely, this really truly is actually a season. Why? My eternity is in heaven.